Category Archives: My Cats

Not Gone

It has been over a year and a half since Rascal passed away. I think of him very often. He’s still with me in spirit. I have since adopted a new male cat, Scamp, who helps fill the void left by Rascal.

While Scamp, in no way replaces Rascal, he is similar in many ways. He’s a rogue like Rascal. They both want constant attention and like to play all the time and play rough.

Rascal hasn’t visited me in my dreams in a long time, but I think of him a lot. He was a very special cat.

Feeling better

Rascal visited me this morning. Before you call the guys in the white coats, let me explain. This morning, I was half sleeping. The radio was on and I was drifting in and out of sleep. I felt something jump up on me. It felt like a cat, but it didn’t feel like Pandora. I immediately thought, “Could it be Rascal?” It jumped off of me and laid down right next to me. I turned over and I saw Rascal. I was overjoyed. Then I woke up.

Rather than being disappointed that it was “only a dream”, I was elated. I felt good. No matter what it was, I felt him. For just a second or two, I felt that he was there. I was very happy that he came back… even if it was “only a dream”. I believe that when you love someone, he or she is never really dead. I do believe that they can come back and make their presence know. I think this is true of animals as well. They come back if we are willing for them to.

Regardless of what my experience this morning was, I know that Rascal is still alive as long as I love him and I know he’ll be back from time to time… if “only in my dreams”.

An emptiness

While I was still lying in bed this morning, Pandora cam and laid at the head of the bed. I was physically petting her, but I was really petting Rascal.

I went to church this morning and my church friends were very supportive of me. Many of them have had indoor pets and know what pain it is to lose them.

When I got back home, the place seemed somewhat empty. Pandora was lying on the bed. I felt an urge to go look for Rascal, but I know he’s no longer here. I just decided to love Pandora all the more. A few tears are welling up as I write this.

1997 – 2007

Rascal breathed his last breath today. I had been giving him the fluids. He seemed to be doing fairly well, considering his condition. I haven’t posted much in the last few weeks, because there hadn’t been much of a change. Basically, he was hanging in there. His appetite had improved and he was eating dry cat food. I had an appointment for the vet for him this coming Monday.

Anyway, I had noticed that he breathed heavily when I picked him up. I noticed this earlier this week. On Wednesday, I went to the vet’s office to get some more fluid. I asked them about it. Since Rascal would be OK again when I put him back down, we thought that it might be anxiety because he thought I was going to give him fluid.

Anyway, earlier today, he didn’t seem to be any different. I went to Scottsburg with my friend, Judy. We were concerned about another friend of ours, so we drove there to visit her. I was supposed to go, with Judy, to a dinner tonight.

After I got back from Scottsburg, I noticed that Rascal was breathing very heavily even when he was just sitting on the bed. I called Judy and told her about it and I cancelled my evening with her. I called the animal hospital and they told me to bring him in right away. I had to stop at Judy’s on my way, because she had left the tickets in my car. On my way to Judy’s, I knew things weren’t good at all when Rascal started gurgling. While I was at Judy’s (I was still in the car, Rascal stopped breathing and stiffened. I called Judy back to the car. We hugged and both cried.

I called my friend, Jerry and asked him if I could bring Rascal up to his place in Scottsburg. When Rascal was first diagnosed, I asked Jerry if we could bury Rascal in his yard. Of course, he had said “yes”. When I got there, we wrapped him in a towel I had with him in his cat carrier. We then put him in a box and buried him. I was really moved when I saw that Jerry had already mad a small plaque out of cement that read “Rascal”. That was one of the nicest things that anyone has ever done for me.

I visited with Jerry for a while. I’m back home now. When I got in the apartment, I picked up Pandora and told her that Rascal wasn’t coming back and it was just her and me now. I asked her to give her daddy a little extra love for the next few days. Even though she can’t understand me talking to her, I think she knows what happened. Animals are very intuitive.

I’m OK now, but I know the next few days will be hard. I appreciate all the kind thoughts of my friends and family. Thanks.

The life of Reilly

Rascal is doing better. The vet didn’t find any evidence of infection. We started Rascal on fluid therapy. He got his first treatment on Wednesday. Every 2 or 3 days, we’re going to give him fluids subcutaneously. This will help get rid of the toxins. I’ve heard people tell me that they’ve had cats live for five years of more with kidney disease.

Rascal had his first treatment on Wednesday and one on Saturday morning. He seems to be eating better and has just a tad more energy. I saw him eat some dried cat food earlier today. He still not eating a lot, but he is eating. I’m very encouraged.

A New Hope

Why do I feel like George Lucas? 🙂

I took Rascal to see Dr. David Jones. Rascal’s weight has dropped to 7 pounds! He was very reassuring, however and he said that he wants to get some more information before he can say anything definite. He said that in cat’s Rascal’s age, when there is kidney failure, there is usually some underlying cause. Once the cause is identified, you treat it. He said that it could be an infection. He gave me some oral antibiotics to give Rascal. His approach is to try things and see if they make a difference. He also needs a urine specimen from Rascal. He gave the tools to get it. Once we have that, he’ll know more. At least I have a plan now and that makes me feel a little better.

Made it to 2007

Rascal has officially made it to 2007. He’s not doing well, but he’s not doing too bad either, considering his problems.

He’s eating a little, however, finding things he will eat is a challenge. I can’t tell from day to day what he’ll eat what he won’t. He ate some lamb baby food today. That made me feel better.

I have read that cats with CRF will start to smell because of all the toxins that accumulate in their bodies. Rascal does smell now. Earlier today, I caught a whiff of him and all I could think about was the “stench of death”. I know it sounds pretty morbid of me, but those thoughts go through my head. I’m trying to keep being positive, but it’s difficult sometime.

I have gotten him an appointment to see Dr. David Jones tomorrow. He’s a vet that specializes in cats. Another friend of mine takes his cats to David. Also, I’m acquainted with him and I know he’s a good guy. I hope he can recommend some things to me that will improve the way Rascal feels and possibly extend his life. I’ll just have to keep the faith. Any thoughts and prayers anyone would like to offer would be appreciated as well.

Still enough energy to cause havok…


Rascal got me out of bed this morning by knocking almost everything off my dresser. After I put everything back, I got ready for work. Before I left, I gave him some different kind of Fancy Feast. It’s called Elegant Medley’s – White Meat Chicken and Whipped Egg SoufflĂ© with Garden Greens. To my delight, he actually ate it. He had eaten quite a bit of it by the time I left. I hope that it’s all gone when I get home.

Today, I called another vet I know. He specializes in cats. I left him a message and he hasn’t called me back yet.

Emotional rollercoaster

This situation is getting to me. I certainly don’t want Rascal to leave me, but there will be a little relief for me. Each day, my emotions run from hope and optimism to sadness and despair.

For the last few days, Rascal has not been eating much. About all I could get him to eat was the gravy out of the Fancy Feast I gave him. He’d take a little peace of the meat, suck off the gravy and spit the meat back in the bowl. I’ve been very discouraged. Tonight, when I got home, I tried giving him some of the lamb baby food. He ate some of it.

Everytime I leave the apartment, I dread coming back because of what I might find. I know that someday, I’m going to find his lifeless body. I don’t want to, but I know it will happen. When I come back and I see he’s still around, I am relieved… that is until the next time I leave.

I’m getting tired.

Missing him already

Rascal’s basically doing OK, but I’m concerned that he isn’t eating enough. I only rarely see him eat. He’s drinking and using the litter box OK. I miss him because he’s not acting like himself. He will sit in one place for hours at a time. He doesn’t lie down much.

I’d give almost anything for him to bother me when I’m on the computer. He sit with me and let me pet him for several minutes. He didn’t used to let me do that. I’m going to try to enjoy him as much as I can and make him as comfortable as possible. We’ll just see how it goes.